Post by The Messiah of Human Torture on May 31, 2010 20:16:58 GMT -5
*The camera, operated by a camera man, spins around to see that GM Iser has pulled into a drive through at the local Burger King outside Houston, Texas. To his right is Chase and in the passnger seat is Raven. Everyone is wearing their memorabilia in black. Iser pulls out a pen and pad as he puts the truck in park.*
Iser: Alright, we got about two hundred more miles to drive. I'm sorry we couldn't get limos but I don't trust the drivers in this state so I'm driving you all up myself. What do you all want for food?
Camera man: I'd just want a whopper with large french fires.
*Iser writes this down before he turns to Raven*
Raven: I'd want just a double whopper with cheese...and if the cook puts a giant salad on top of the burger, I'll pwn him worse than I pwn Ryu's online.
*Iser just calmly writes that request down.*
Chase: Alright, I'd want the same thing except two orders of onion rings to go with that.
*Iser then writes that down*
Iser: I know what I'd want...so let's hurry up.
*The car in front of them drives off and Iser pulls up.*
Order boy bitch: Hello and welcome to Burger King, how may I help you?
Raven: *Whispering to Chase* That guy sounds like a complete hick. His accent is stronger than BMW's stupidity.
*Everyone snickers to themselves as Iser orders all the food. After he does so, he's told the total is around thirty dollars and to drive up to the second window. Iser rolls his eyes and drives off to the second window as instructed*
Iser: Alright...where the hell are they?
Raven: Maybe he got lost in his own kitchen?
Chase: Perhaps he set his uniform on fire.
Raven: Pshhht...uniformity. What a bunch of losers.
*They begin to wait for quite a while. They start getting really irritated as they wait in the window. Finally an ugly female opens the window as all people in the truck turn to the girl very irritated.*
Girl: Did you want all of that?
Raven: Yes! This isn't a damn rib! We need our damn food!
Chase: This isn't a fucking joke.
Girl: If you keep with that tone, you won't get your food.
*Chase and Raven do the sarcastic OOOOOOH*
Raven: Well, ex--
*Raven is cut off by the slamming of the driver's door. Iser has exited the truck*
Raven: Here we go. Make sure you tape all of this, chumpstain.
Iser: You mean we've waited twenty fucking minutes and you dumbasses don't even fix it!? This isn't a fucking joke because we ordered thirty dollars of fucking food you dumb slut!
*We suddenly hear snickering from Raven and Chase*
Girl: But si--
Iser: But NOTHING! We have another two hundred fucking miles to drive in a couple of hours in this damn state and we've wasted twenty minutes because you dumb fucks don't even know the fucking kitchen! Quit riding your horse's dick and get our fucking food or you ain't getting any fucking money for this god damned order!
*The girl walks off as Iser, still visibly pissed starts to get into the car. Raven and Chase are busy laughing like crazy*
Iser: They haven't even fixed the fucking drinks! Jesus fucking christ, are they THAT dumb!?
Raven: They thought we're a joke, Iser.
Iser: Does me telling her to stop jerking off her fucking horse and actually get our fucking food a joke!?
Chase: Dude, after you said that, I don't want to eat here now.
Raven: Same. Let's go else where.
*Iser lets out a sigh*
Iser: That's the best idea I've heard all day.
*Iser drives off into the night, still visibly pissed*
Iser: Motherfucking bitch. I knew this was a cock hungry state, but that is fucking ridiculous. Jesus H motherfucking Christ. I can't believe those dumb son of a bitches in their fucking retarded ass brown gay cowboy hats go all brokeback mountain with eachother and hire these dumb cunts so they don't look like fags!
Raven: Tell us how you really feel.
*Iser soon drives off heading in a direction of a Sonics which is another fifty miles away*
Raven: Yeah, we can wait fifty miles for the best food in the world.
Iser: Alright, we got about two hundred more miles to drive. I'm sorry we couldn't get limos but I don't trust the drivers in this state so I'm driving you all up myself. What do you all want for food?
Camera man: I'd just want a whopper with large french fires.
*Iser writes this down before he turns to Raven*
Raven: I'd want just a double whopper with cheese...and if the cook puts a giant salad on top of the burger, I'll pwn him worse than I pwn Ryu's online.
*Iser just calmly writes that request down.*
Chase: Alright, I'd want the same thing except two orders of onion rings to go with that.
*Iser then writes that down*
Iser: I know what I'd want...so let's hurry up.
*The car in front of them drives off and Iser pulls up.*
Order boy bitch: Hello and welcome to Burger King, how may I help you?
Raven: *Whispering to Chase* That guy sounds like a complete hick. His accent is stronger than BMW's stupidity.
*Everyone snickers to themselves as Iser orders all the food. After he does so, he's told the total is around thirty dollars and to drive up to the second window. Iser rolls his eyes and drives off to the second window as instructed*
Iser: Alright...where the hell are they?
Raven: Maybe he got lost in his own kitchen?
Chase: Perhaps he set his uniform on fire.
Raven: Pshhht...uniformity. What a bunch of losers.
*They begin to wait for quite a while. They start getting really irritated as they wait in the window. Finally an ugly female opens the window as all people in the truck turn to the girl very irritated.*
Girl: Did you want all of that?
Raven: Yes! This isn't a damn rib! We need our damn food!
Chase: This isn't a fucking joke.
Girl: If you keep with that tone, you won't get your food.
*Chase and Raven do the sarcastic OOOOOOH*
Raven: Well, ex--
*Raven is cut off by the slamming of the driver's door. Iser has exited the truck*
Raven: Here we go. Make sure you tape all of this, chumpstain.
Iser: You mean we've waited twenty fucking minutes and you dumbasses don't even fix it!? This isn't a fucking joke because we ordered thirty dollars of fucking food you dumb slut!
*We suddenly hear snickering from Raven and Chase*
Girl: But si--
Iser: But NOTHING! We have another two hundred fucking miles to drive in a couple of hours in this damn state and we've wasted twenty minutes because you dumb fucks don't even know the fucking kitchen! Quit riding your horse's dick and get our fucking food or you ain't getting any fucking money for this god damned order!
*The girl walks off as Iser, still visibly pissed starts to get into the car. Raven and Chase are busy laughing like crazy*
Iser: They haven't even fixed the fucking drinks! Jesus fucking christ, are they THAT dumb!?
Raven: They thought we're a joke, Iser.
Iser: Does me telling her to stop jerking off her fucking horse and actually get our fucking food a joke!?
Chase: Dude, after you said that, I don't want to eat here now.
Raven: Same. Let's go else where.
*Iser lets out a sigh*
Iser: That's the best idea I've heard all day.
*Iser drives off into the night, still visibly pissed*
Iser: Motherfucking bitch. I knew this was a cock hungry state, but that is fucking ridiculous. Jesus H motherfucking Christ. I can't believe those dumb son of a bitches in their fucking retarded ass brown gay cowboy hats go all brokeback mountain with eachother and hire these dumb cunts so they don't look like fags!
Raven: Tell us how you really feel.
*Iser soon drives off heading in a direction of a Sonics which is another fifty miles away*
Raven: Yeah, we can wait fifty miles for the best food in the world.
